


Kids or Whatever?

by Ithly



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-13
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-08-30 16:06:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8539546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ithly/pseuds/Ithly
Summary: Aaron and Robert babysit Adam and Vic's newborn. The subject of kids of their own comes up. Aaron and Robert have some history to grapple with before making a decision.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Contains:  
> Roblivion  
> Jack and Jackson mentions.  
> Adam & Vic named their daughter Holly <3
> 
> My first fic. Constructive feedback welcome & desired but please be nice :) Thanks for reading!

It had been another long day at the scrapyard. Robert and Aaron had allowed Adam some semblance of a paternity leave since Vic couldn't afford to leave her job at the Woolpack. Neither could the Woolpack, for that matter. The first two months after baby Holly was born, Marlon had worked so much overtime that they gave Jermaine a shot at doing some cooking. The unanimous negative response from the Woolpack's customers was conclusive enough evidence that Vic was needed. Besides, as much as Vic adored Holly, she needed some time and space without her. Adam was all too happy to fill in on baby duty the rest of the time.

 

That left Aaron shorthanded at the scrapyard, though. And much as Robert tried to act like he was too posh for physical labor, he couldn't bear to see Aaron come home each night, too exhausted for much more than a shower and his tea. (Figures that everything comes back down to Robert's overactive sex drive. Now that Robert had committed to monogamy, he couldn't just go out on the pull when his partner was unavailable, like he had in his previous relationships. It was either Aaron or his hand, and, for better or worse, he'd had enough of his hand.) So Robert became Aaron's underling at the scrapyard, taking demands from Aaron to move this, crush that. It left Robert a bit breathless, and not just from the hauling. Aaron never looks sexier than at the scrapyard, with his tight grey shirts, his high-vis vests, those boots that he'd stomp around in... Aaron telling Robert what to do just made him seem even more irresistible, like he would do literally anything Aaron asked. Plus, no Adam at the yard meant more privacy during their lunch breaks, which, if we're honest, meant there was very little time spent eating lunch.

 

When Adam did come in, he seemed only halfway capable of doing his work. Overjoyed as he was about his new daughter, he'd become absentminded in everything else.

"Oi, what do you think you're doing?!" Aaron shouted to Adam as he began battering a piece of scrap that Aaron had intended on selling. "We're meant to make a mint on that copper!"

Adam looked up, confused. "What you going on about?"

"Maybe you ought to take the rest of the afternoon off, Adam," Aaron suggested. "You're kinda defeating the purpose here."

"Sorry, mate, I was just thinking about Holly. This morning she kicked so hard during her feeding that Vic got a bruise. Man, I felt bad for Vic, but it was so fucking cute. And mate. I swear you gotta see her smile, she looks just like Holly, y'know, our Holly, when she smiles," Adam said wistfully.

Aaron gave Adam a look. "You're in too deep, mate. She's barely even old enough to smile. She was probably just passing gas."

"No Aaron, I'm telling ya. She's special. She's more advanced than all those other kids out there."

"OK, Adam. How about getting back to work then?" Aaron shared a glance with Robert, who was chuckling to himself while he moved some scrap about.

Soon Adam began to wreck some good metal once again and Aaron had enough. "Oi! Mate! You're in your own world with this baby stuff. I think you need to get out of here before you do any more damage."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You're right. I just feel bad I'm putting all this work on you."

"Don't you worry about it," Robert cut in. "We're happy to help. Besides, it means a lot to Vic that you're as involved as you are."

"Thanks, mate. Hey, you know what? I was thinking about giving Vic a little break. It's not that she doesn't love Holly, but she seems exhausted. Any chance you boys would be willing to take her for a couple hours tonight?"

Aaron and Robert glanced at each other once again with pause.

* * *

 

They'd had to have a talk when Holly was first born. Liv had a funny reaction when they visited Vic and Holly in hospital, barely cracking a smile about the baby. When Adam asked her if she wanted to hold Holly, she'd said no. Aaron couldn't figure out what the matter was. She'd developed a great relationship with Vic, happy to spend time with her during the pregnancy but abruptly losing interest after Holly was born. Aaron had to sit her down and wait until she confided in him.

"Please don't be mad."

Aaron smiled. "I couldn't, Liv, I love ya."

Liv's face burned bright red. "Alright, y'know that day the week before Holly was born, when Vic had some pains and they took her to hospital. Only it turned out to be a false alarm?"

"Sure, but what's that got to do with anything?"

"Well, that morning I bumped into Vic. She was getting out of her chair at the caf and I was walking by, and I kind of just elbowed her in the back. Only she seemed fine at first. But then later she went to hospital, and I thought it was my fault because I'd done something to hurt the baby. And now that she's born, I'm so nervous to be around her. She's so delicate, and I've never been around a baby before."

"Y'know, Liv, I was like that too. Did I ever tell you about the day Leo was born? I was havin' a row with Adam in the pub, shoved him, and Rhona fell. She went into labor 'cause of me. Marlon was mad at me, though Rhona and Paddy tried to make it seem like I shouldn't be blamed. I felt awful, though. But you know what? They called me Uncle Aaron, made me his godfather, and when I held him it felt like the most natural thing in the world."

Liv smiled. "But you're a softie, aren't ya?"

Aaron jabbed her in the side. "You shut up. Now, we're gonna go visit Vic, sit you down, and have you hold Holly. And then you'll tell me if it's really that bad, Auntie Liv."

* * *

Aaron's ploy had worked, but Liv was still sensitive about the whole situation. She'd not been back to visit baby Holly since, and still showed hesitation when the subject came up. So now that the idea of her being watched in their home came up, Robert excused himself to call Liv and give her a heads-up.

That night, Liv was running around the Mill, baby-proofing away. It was Robert's idea: give her a distraction to avoid her fretting. Aaron had gone to pick up Holly, along with all the supplies they would need. He was no stranger to newborns; Robert, on the other hand, hadn't really been around one since Andy's Sarah was born. He'd been a natural so far with Holly, though.

"The good thing about a newborn is you don't have to do any entertaining," Robert is telling Liv as Aaron walks in with Holly. "You just sit and stare at it and until it falls asleep."

"Alright, so I can expect you to be the one to do the feedin' and changin' tonight, can I?" Liv retorts.

Robert's taken aback, seemingly having forgotten about the tasks he might be expected to take up tonight.

"Oi, keep it on the down-low, but we'll let Aaron bear the brunt of those jobs, won't we?"

Liv smirks. No way is Aaron going to let Robert get away with that.

 

Fortunately Holly's been fed just before Aaron picked her up, so they lay her in the portable bassinette while the three of them sit down to Robert's lasagna.

"So Liv, you ready to get some bonding on with your niece?" Aaron asks through a mouthful of food.

"Think I might take a pass on that one, got loads of homework. Cheers for the offer, though!" she replies cheekily.

"At some point you're gonna have to spend some time with her or she won't know who you are. Besides, she's so close to falling asleep all you need to do is sit with her on your lap."

"Did I mention that homework that really needed doing?"

Robert's having none of it. "You're so eager about your schoolwork today, think we might want to take up babysitting every evening."

 

Liv asks to be excused and locks herself away in her room. Soon enough she's cranking her music up loud and Holly is bawling.

"Does she have no consideration?"

"Robert, she's just a kid. She doesn't know any better. I'll tell her to shut it off."

"Fine, I'll take Holly for a walk around outside in the meantime."

With Liv agreeing to a slight decrease in volume, Aaron grunts and tells her he's heading outside to accompany Robert.

"She's more annoying than the infant, you know."

"Shut it, Robert. She's having a hard time getting used to all this. She's barely had any family for most of her life. It's not so easy getting used to more and more new people."

"I can appreciate that, but she doesn't have to give us grief about it."

"She's not, honest. She didn't think about the music thing."

"You know what, though, Aaron... I reckon we're pretty good at this whole parenting thing."

"You what?"

"Well, we're doing a lot better than Sandra did, for one."

"That ain't sayin' much, Robert."

"And look how happy Holly is with us! Aside from Liv's interference she's been happy as a clam."

"Robert, it's been one hour. You ain't even had to change her yet."

"Oh no, Aaron, I haven't. But I don't anticipate needing to."

"Don't tell me you're ready to give her back already? You were just goin' on about bein' a natural."

"Yes, Aaron, but I believe in equal division of labor. You do the changing, and in exchange I do everything but."

Aaron stops walking to keel over in laughter. "You're joking, mate. No chance in hell."

"Well, we'll see about that, won't we."

 

With Holly back asleep and the three of them indoors and warm, Aaron and Robert are happy to savour some quiet alone time. They flip the TV on to the cooking channel. By now it's a no-fail strategy: Liv hates cooking shows, and can be expected to stay in her room if she knows that's what's on. In the meantime, there's enough sound coming off the set that Robert and Aaron can make some noise without grossing out Liv. Liv isn't to know that they've got no interest in watching the show either.

Aaron's lying on the sofa, feet up on the coffee table, beer in hand. Robert's sprawled across the rest of the sofa, feet up on a pillow, head on Aaron's chest, staring at the ceiling.

"I'm serious, you know. It's nice to have a baby around. Co-parenting a difficult teenager is one thing, but there's something about a baby that feels so gentle and rewarding," Robert says.

Aaron tilts Robert's head up toward him. "Where is this side of you coming from all of a sudden?"

"What makes you say all of a sudden?"

"Well, we've never talked about kids before."

Robert leaps up, jarring Aaron. "Oh, babe, I'm not asking you for a baby if that's what you're thinking." His face is flush, and he's tripping on his words to make sure Aaron hasn't gotten the wrong idea. Not that it's the _wrong_  idea, per se... But Robert never planned on bringing it up first. He's kicking himself now, always the one to want to rush into things. First with the "I love you's" and then planning the proposal before even hearing an "I love you" back... For Robert it's been a work in progress, constantly trying not to scare Aaron off with big ideas before he's ready.

"Robert, talk to me. You said the day we got engaged we were gonna talk. I need you to be honest with me. So say it."

"Alright, but please, if you don't agree, just tell me."

"Robert!"

Robert curls up next to Aaron, legs tucked underneath him, taking Aaron's right hand with both of his. He brushes Aaron's fist up and down with his thumb. "OK. Look. I certainly was no good for Lachlan. Well, we had our moments, but whatever good I did was mostly out of self-interest. And Liv, well, we come on more as siblings than anything else. Don't take this the wrong way, but I always thought I would make it with Chrissie. I expected us to have a baby within the first couple years of our marriage -- she wasn't getting any younger, after all -- and in addition to everything I thought I lost, everything I thought was expected of me -- the wife, the home, the business, the money -- I thought I'd lost the family too. And I was too stupid to understand that family is just whoever gives you that feeling of home, and the reason I couln't stop with you when I was with her was because that's what you were to me."

Robert pauses, suddenly out of breath from stumbling over his words, rushing to qualify everything he'd been saying so that Aaron didn't take it the wrong way, so that Aaron knew just how loved he was. And so that, as assured as he always hoped Aaron was, he made it clear he was well and truly past Chrissie.

"Aaron. You're my family now. So is Liv. So is Vic, and Holly, and Adam. Diane, Andy, Bernice. Your mum. Paddy, even, as much as we resent each other!" Aaron snorts, the subject still a sore spot for him what with them still not having received Paddy's approval.

"I'm still working out what it means to be with you. Because it's not just you. You're the easy part. I know I want to be with you, I know I love you, I understand how stupid I was to deny that. But it's a lot of work to separate what it is I actually want for myself, from what it is I thought my father would have wanted for me, what was expected of me." Robert rubs his forehead with his fingertips. He's never been one to cry, but he's getting himself worked up.

Aaron grabs him round the arm and leans Robert's head back onto his shoulder. "You know you don't have to make him this constant presence in your mind, in your life. He's gone. I know you loved him and wanted his approval, but he can't be this weight hanging over you."

"No, Aaron, he's not anymore. Once I accepted everything with you, it's felt easier to let that go. But I still don't want to feel like I've disappointed him."

Robert feels like he's picked up some steam, about to make a major breakthrough, when Holly starts crying. Aaron gets up to check on her.

 

"Oi, how could you possibly do that, kid? You're barely the size of a football! Robert, you're on."

Aaron is holding Holly out at arms length, nodding toward Robert to get on diaper duty.

"Oh, no, Aaron, we have a deal."

"Robert. You're the one who just brought up the idea of us havin' kids. So if you want that conversation to ever continue, I demand you address this nappy."

Robert begrudgingly gets off the sofa, taking Holly into the bathroom to change her. Seconds later he's back out, though.

"Aaron?"

"Yes, Robert?" Aaron replies from the sofa where he's reclining and enjoying his beer.

"So, uh, I'll grant you that I deserved this one, but, well... I'm not really sure how to change a nappy."

Aaron rolls his eyes. How adorable that a man so self-assured can be so incompetent in other ways. Fortunately Aaron has experience with Leo that he can put to use. Together they returned to the bathroom, this time with the necessary supplies.

 

Shortly after changing Holly, Aaron realizes it's time to drop her back off at Adam and Vic's.

"I'll take her. You get ready for bed. I know you're tired from work."

"Thanks," Aaron says, giving Robert a quick peck on the lips before getting up to clean up dinner and head upstairs.

* * *

Aaron's just brushed his teeth and is changing his clothes when Robert walks into the bedroom. "Well, I'm knackered."

"No surprise, mate, you're not exactly cut out for physical labor."

"Oi! Why do you always insist on forgetting I once worked at the garage just like you?"

"That was a lifetime ago. Now you're Mr. Posh Businessman, aren't ya?"

"Nah, I'm Mr. Robert Sugden, husband of Mr. Aaron Dingle. I'm Mr. Happy to Help My Husband Work If He Needs Me To. And I'm Mr. Indulges in a Nice Long Look at my Husband's Arse at the Scrapyard While He's Not Looking."

Aaron chuckles. "Maybe you'd have found today less exhausting if you weren't constantly letting me turn you on at work."

"But I can't help it when I'm around you. I haven't even got a choice in the matter." Robert walks up to where Aaron's standing at the foot of the bed, grabs his arse, and nuzzles his neck. "You're so goddamn irresistible. I'm hopeless when I'm around you."

Aaron tangles his fingers in Robert's hair. "Sorry to be so distracting," he whispers in Robert's ear before letting go of his hair so that he can creep his hands up under Robert's shirt, palming the skin along his sides before reaching up to his chest, hands over pecs. "Feels like you're adding some muscle, Mr. Sugden."

Robert exhales deeply. "Keep it up at the yard, you're gonna see a whole new side of me."

With that, Aaron pulls Robert's shirt up over his head and pushes him gently onto the bed. He runs his hands over Robert's shoulders and biceps with a hum of approval. After kissing sloppily, Aaron pulls back.

"Robert. You reek."

"Beg your pardon?"

"I think Holly spit up on you. Your neck stinks."

Robert groans. "Can't you just ignore it? Please? I've been waiting all day since Adam made his surprise appearance."

"No chance. Get in the shower."

"Will you wait up?"

"I'll try, but I'm not making any promises."

* * *

Aaron is snoring softly when Robert returns to the bedroom. Figures, Robert thinks. He drops his towel and climbs into bed, shifting Aaron onto his side so that he can snuggle up around him.

"I waited up for you," Aaron whispers.

"You don't have to lie, babe. I heard you snoring."

"No, I promise. You smell great now. I'm definitely ready for ya."

Robert laughs. "That's really sweet, but you earned your kip."

Almost before he finishes his sentence Robert hears another little snore. He drops his head down to Aaron's neck and breathes in his musky smell. 'This is most definitely what home feels like,' he thinks.

* * *

The next morning, Liv's up and out to school early. Robert catches her on the way out, but she's not much for talking. Probably still doesn't want to discuss the night before, he thinks.

He makes two coffees and carries them up to the bedroom, eager to awaken Aaron now that they have the house to themselves.

"Morning, hon. Coffee?"

Aaron shakes the covers off as he props himself up on his elbows. "You see Liv off?"

"Yup."

"Cheers. And thanks for the coffee."

"No problem. By the way, you still owe me for last night. I let you off easy."

"Oi, I told you I was game, did I not?"

"That barely counts. I'm not having sex with a comatose man."

Aaron laughs. "Alright, but I'm awake now. Adam's not working today, it's not like anyone will notice if we're late."

"Sounds good to me," Robert says, sitting back down on the bed. He reaches over to grab Aaron's coffee and put it on the nightstand. Robert grabs hold of Aaron's chin with his thumb and forefinger so he can pull Aaron's face closer. He kisses him softly, savouring the mix of coffee and mint in their mingling breath. Aaron responds by grabbing Robert by the back of the neck, yanking him down so that Robert is lying directly on top of him. Aaron can feel Robert already. "Wow, someone's eager."

"Shut up," Robert groans, throwing his t-shirt off and wriggling his sweatpants down. Aaron finishes the job for him, making sure there's no clothing left between the two of them. Aaron grabs them both with his fist, Robert moaning into Aaron's chest. Robert licks a stripe between Aaron's pecs before settling on sucking one nipple, then the other. Aaron lets go of himself to just focus on Robert, pumping his fist up and down as Robert bites his nipple gently, playfully.

Aaron shoves Robert off and climbs on top of him, lowering himself on his knees between Robert's legs to take him in his mouth, his way of apologizing for the delay since the night before. But much as Robert is enjoying it, he wants to be inside Aaron. He licks his fingers and sits up, reaching out toward Aaron's arse, which is hovering in the air while his mouth is angled down toward Robert's crotch. He inserts his fingers, feeling Aaron lean into it. Before Robert feels like he's going to explode, he pushes Aaron off and grabs the lube from the side table. Aaron stares up at him with blue eyes, sat on his knees waiting for Robert to do all the work.

Robert covers himself with lube and then reaches out, taking Aaron by the hips and pulling him on top before lowering the man gently onto himself. Aaron moans, back arched, clutching the sheets beneath him for dear life. Robert's holding Aaron by the thighs, pumping up and down. As the pace quickens, Aaron takes hold of his cock, stroking it quickly to match Robert's thrusts. Soon he hears Robert's familiar whines that indicate he's close to coming, and Aaron starts to stroke even faster. As he feels Robert unload inside him, he leans back to ride out Robert's orgasm. Then Robert's sitting up, panting into Aaron's chest, grabbing hold of Aaron's cock to finish him off.

* * *

"So now that I've paid up, it's time for you to do the same," Aaron says. He's on his side, snuggled into Robert's arm, top leg thrown over one of Robert's. "We never finished our conversation last night."

"Which one is that?" Robert asks, though he thinks he knows, secretly dreading revisiting it. It took a lot of energy to open up that way, and while they were as intimate as could be moments before, it scares him to talk about it in the light of day.

Aaron speaks first. "You know I never even thought I would want to be a dad. When Leo was born, I couldn't believe the three of them wanted me to have such a big part in his life. I thought it had a lot to do with what I was going through with Jackson at the time. Like they took pity on me or something. None of them knew, but I already knew what Jackson was planning. Back then, I was barely ready for a relationship, and then I had one, and then I was talking all sorts about commitment, I was so in over my head. And Leo came along, and no matter how annoying his three ( _three_!) parents were to me, he just felt like this sweet little ball of comfort when I held him. But with everything else going on I didn't really stop to think about what place a baby could have in my own life."

Robert sits up, turns to look at Aaron's face.

"I don't know how I feel about it all. No matter what the options are - surrogacy, adoption - there are no guarantees. And it's expensive either way. We might even end up with a kid who's well beyond their infancy."

"We've already got one with Liv," Robert says with a chuckle. "And, hey, in some senses she still does behave like an infant too."

"And that's the other thing, Robert. We've got Liv. I know she's only my sister, but I feel like our hands are full right now. I just... Don't want to discourage it if that's what you really want."

Robert exhales deeply. "OK, here's the deal. You know how I said all that about my dad, and Chrissie? I thought about it some more after you went to sleep. And I realized that, yes, my dad would've wanted me to have a family, and a good job, and a home and some money. But I think I'm already there. I have all of those things. I know that because every day I come home and I feel so _satisfied_. My life feels so full and happy. And the only thing I think would make it happier would be a child, with you. Except I don't _need_  to be happier, because I'm already as happy as I could possibly imagine being. It's like that thing about infinity, where technically infinity plus one is greater than infinity itself, only... infinity is already infinity! Does that make sense?"

Aaron laughs. "I'm no maths expert, but I think I understand."

"And, well, I guess first I want to know how you feel about it. Because I don't want anything that doesn't make you happy as well."

"I think what we're both hinting at is that we're open to it. And that we would want it. Someday."

"Yeah, that's the other thing. I felt like it was more pressing with Chrissie because women's bodies and all that. But we don't have to rush. The process itself will take some time no matter which way we choose."

"Good, because I don't want to mess up with Liv. She's already overwhelmed with just a new niece. And she's still getting through a lot of rough stuff from the past couple years. And now I'm the one responsible for her. So I want to be able to focus on her for a little while at least."

"Don't worry, babe, you're doing an amazing job. And based on what I've seen already, when the time is right and we do have one of our own, you're going to be one hell of an amazing dad."

"Thanks."

"Now are you going to tell me I am as well or what?"

"I think you're going to have to learn a bit more about nappies first."

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry, I don't know why I did this.  
> aarondinglestears.tumblr.com


End file.
